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Appreciating the Present

by Gabrielle on April 16th, 2008

Last week as M and I were enjoying an evening at a friends’ house (something we don’t do often enough), I caught a glimpse of a set of 10 little statements, mantras almost, clipped from a new agey magazine and hanging in her kitchen. My first impulse was to tease, but then I started reading them and gosh, a lot of them made sense. Live gratefully. Be aware of what you eat….and why. Dance a little every day. We started talking about said magazine and I was gifted with an older copy to preview. And I read it cover to cover during our out of state trip last weekend.

The article that struck me most was one on Appreciating the Present, which is hard to do in a society that is so goal-oriented and focused on the future.

I happen to be in a place where there will be some time between now and our next actual FET (frozen embryo transfer), perhaps several months, so this discussion is timely for me. While I have been gifted with more time to prepare myself mentally and physically for our next round (see, that’s me. goal-oriented, focused on the future), surely I should be using some of that time to appreciate what I have right now, right?

So, what do I have right now? I have a med-free existence with no physical restrictions placed on what I do, what I eat, what I drink, where I go. It is springtime and I am in love (as always) with a great husband and blessed with some very cool friends. That’s not nothing.

I had to laugh when I read Kami’s post yesterday over at Are We There Yet? Apparently I am not the only one who is trying to do a better job appreciating the here and now. Kami writes about enjoying her first bike ride of the spring:

As I was riding and realizing how much fun I was having I thought, “Hmmm . . . maybe I will blog about this.” I started composing the blog in my mind. Then I realized, instead of enjoying the moment I was telling a story about the moment. “Craziness!”, I told myself and brought my attention back to the feel of the wind, the view going by, the people I would pass and say “hi” to. I wondered if one or more of those people was trying to conceive and here I am with a pregnant belly - not only disturbing their quiet walk, but also shouting a friendly, “Hello!” “Hmmm . . . maybe I should blog about this” and off my mind went.

And I admit, I do this all the time. And like Kami, I need to get better at separating my life and my blogable life. Aside from that, here are some other things that I am trying to do to appreciate this time between cycles, before meds, before the testing, before the stress and anticipation of another try:

1.) I am giving yoga another shot. I tried it perhaps a year ago and left feeling sore and impatient. I must be in a different place now because I left yesterday’s session relaxed, renewed, still a little sore, but in a good way. I appreciated the forced meditation aspect of it and the constant reminders to be mindful of how my body felt and how my breathing sounded.

2.) I am amping up my time at the gym and outside. Perhaps I became frustrated with yoga last year because I was trying to use it as a replacement rather than a supplement for other activities. On days when I am able, I am trying to hit the gym once in the morning and once after work. When that’s not possible, I am trying to take at least a 20 minute walk outside. Have you seen it outside? It is gorgeous! And for once, a sunny day isn’t followed by a week of rain. The forecast for the next several days sounds glorious and I intend to take full advantage of it.

3.) I am spending more time with family and friends. We should get together. Oh yes, let’s get together. When? Oh I dunno, I’m awfully busy…..Do you do this? I do this. And it’s not untrue, but I am trying to work harder at finding time to be with people I value. If not now, then when? And pre-cycle feels like a good time to do this. Somehow, invites for cocktails or happy hour always get scheduled faster.

And like Kami, I will try not to think about blogging about these things as I do them.

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POSTED IN: environment, living with infertility, shared experiences