Infertility Blogs - Social Responsibility or Self Indulgence?
I was actually going to post this as a response to a comment left on Stirrup Queens and Sperm Palace Jesters, but then I decided it was too off topic and I would have been responding not the post itself, which was wonderful, but to one of the comments left for it.
I’m bothered by the response of an anonymous reader who said to Melissa,
I understand that infertility is where you have chosen to focus much of your considerable energy and that, no doubt, is for the good. And I agree that issues that infertiles face, particularly the judgements from others regarding what they should or should not do, are inappropriate at best and crude and ignorant at worst. But you have turned your infertility and your blog into a cottage industry and that is where I find you in particular to be especially commercial and self indulgent. (emphasis is mine)
Because I feel the same comment could be left on a Lance Armstrong “Live Strong” website, a Susan Komen “Walk for the Cure” site, a Michael J. Fox Parkinson’s disease website. The list goes on and on.
Why is it that with any other medical condition that affects millions of people, someone speaking on it, writing on it, doing something about it, is seen as brave and admirable. It is almost a social responsibility. When we hear of a celebrity who is struggling with an illness of or condition that doesn’t want to lend his/her name to the cause, it seems almost selfish. Why don’t they want to help?
Yet a blogger who has focused her attention and time raising awareness, building a community, supporting others who are trying to support themselves and writing some excellent essays and articles along the way is accused of being self-indulgent.
It makes me sad.
And in fact, gives me pause as I try to type out my own blog post this morning. Am I being self-indulgent? (That answer is yes. ALL blogs are self-indulgent. It is the nature of the medium.) Am I commercializing my life by trying to share it and gain strength and insight from others experiencing the same thing? Am I a shameless capitalist by trying to educate an audience about infertility issues?
If my blog were called “A Cancer Survivor’s Quest to Understand What the H*ll Happened to Her Body Under Treatment” which it very well could be, I feel as if this would be a non-issue.
Am I wrong?
Tags: , blogs, cancer, cool-women, fertility blog, infertility, social responsibilityRelated Stories
POSTED IN: cancer, infertility treatments, living with infertility
5 opinions for Infertility Blogs - Social Responsibility or Self Indulgence?
Angelique
Feb 4, 2008 at 8:24 am
Gab:
You’re right — all our blogs are in some way “self-indulgent”, but that doesn’t make them any less important or potentially useful.
Just keep writing — negative comments are part of the medium, too. *sigh* We still love ya!
loribeth
Feb 4, 2008 at 9:42 am
Excellent post. The comment also bothered me, put your finger on a very important point as to why it was objectionable.
Of course all blogs are self-indulgent. If you don’t like mine, don’t read it!
Gabrielle
Feb 4, 2008 at 11:31 am
Hear! Hear! Loribeth! And thank you for your compliment.
Angelique, you’re right, on both counts. Don’t you worry. I’ll keep writing. The comment wasn’t directed towards me, but someone whom I respect very, very much, and who is the last person I would accuse of being self-indulgent. In fact, it was her blog and blogroll that made me realize I wasn’t alone. Which is why the comment was so upsetting to me.
Pamela Jeanne
Feb 4, 2008 at 11:54 am
Thanks, Gabrielle, for this post. I saw the same comment and got sad, too, because this commenter so clearly lacks compassion. What a different tune she would be singing if she had any problems in the procreation department. I didn’t have the energy to post on it since the tongue lashing I got from another “mother” … it seems so ironic to apply that term — which connotes kindness and nurturing — to someone so lacking in nurturing skills. Just another one of life’s “what the?” moments.
Shinejil
Feb 5, 2008 at 12:55 pm
I think the commenter, besides completely misunderstanding IF, also had little clue about human suffering. Some people feel terrible about things that others brush off, and that is their subjective experience they have to deal with. If these people get together to be constructive and supportive in their suffering, that’s their choice and none of the commenter’s business. Why bother to post a comment on a blog you find self-indulgent? Very strange, the things people do.
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